many muslims are culturally muslim. if u come from a country/culture where everyone is muslim you take something like the salaams for granted. it’s not a race issue. it’s a cultural issue.

many muslims i notice in big cities tend to not really give out salaams.

However, my attitude quickly changed. I stopped caring and I still don’t care if a person gives me the greeting or not because that is on their soul, not mine.

We cannot force anyone to speak to us. So, I wait until other Muslims speak to me and then I return a better greeting.

Furthermore, there are many Muslims or so-called Muslims who think they are better because they were born into Islam. However, those are the ones you see in many cases violating the basic principles such as not speaking to other Muslims. As for those who feel that way let them be, God always deals justly.

I believe that your actions must be in accordance with what you say you believe. So, it matters not the color.

I kind of gave up on greeting sisters in general. I thought it was just me. But I was at the Mall and saw a Turkish woman at a distance in hijab–I was in a different section when I looked towards that section of the store a South Asian woman in hijab appeared and didn’t greet that sister. Then (I was observing) I came a little closer to the purse/bags section and say it again. I thought, hmmm it’s just not me who get snubbed. South Asians in MD are rude to most people. The woman kept staring at her like she was waiting for acknowledgment.
A different time I was in a department store and there was an African (different one) sister in hijab looking at scarves. I stepped out of the norm and greeted/spoke to her because she seemed nice. She was, I had to tell her I usually don’t speak to Muslim women because they’re rude, refuse to greet you back and act racist. She was visiting from a European country and she said since she’s been here she’s noticed it. The ummah is messed up and many of us don’t have the courage to look inward to address our defects. To those who state why we have to air the dirty laundry–it’s because that’s how we get people to address it instead of people pretending we comprise some Islamic utopia in the West where “there’s no racism in Islam” but plenty of racist Muslims. Just like when Bill Cosby made those controversial comments about Blacks and people were upset. To quote Malcolm X: The dog that yelped is the one that got hit by the shoe or something like that (the ones who are upset that we’re talking about it are likely the ones guilty of it). Sometimes I wish Allah just destroys it all and start over. Guess that’s what the hereafter is for, I’m tired of dealing with this. We already have to deal with the crap of non-Muslims and then others want to bring more crap. The best Muslims I’ve met are the ones who don’t attend masjid, because they don’t want to be invovled in the phoniness or ‘groupthink.’ It’s a lie and Allah is the author of Truth. Allah is busting it wide open. Subhan’Allah.

as salamu alaykum and hope you are well bi’idhnillah.

I’ve experienced this from Arab women, Pakistan and Indian women, and a few occasions with white convert sisters (who have been converts for a while) and even African ladies. We really are disconnected from one another.

I think it is important that we focus more on being adamant about giving the greetings in the most sincere way possible for the sake of Allah. I give salams to every sister I see and if they don’t hear me I say it again. I’ve seen some change in some sisters that weren’t too responsive in the past here. InshaAllah if we remain persistent fillah and put aside our ego we will be able to connect better with each other.

Too funny. This fat girl Muslim has never run into that problem.

The correlation that you make between the sin of gluttony and body size is a little suspect Abu Sinan.

Try reading Dr. Linda Bacon’s Health at Every Size: The Surprising Truth About Your Weight and other recent studies that are not fueled by the American diet industry. Just a little food for thought (pun intended).

been a long time since i’ve been checked out the blogspehere. i know this is late, but mabrook to you and marc lol. i always thought you two would make a nice couple lol.

neways, regarding the topic at hand, erm how old were the sisters in question? i ask, because i swear i think its a generational thing. When i give salams and get blanked, its pretty much by every race/ethinic group lol (including my fellow somalians) but one thing that those who blank me have in common is their age groups. I find that younger sisters regardless of background tend to give salams back, and if were’re in a busy area or they’re at a distance, they’ll smile or give a little heads up and acknowlegde my presence and i do the same likewise.

Its usually those in my mothers age group (45 yrs old and upwards) that blank me. I swear, they’ll be times i’ll repeat my salams, thinking: “oh maybe they didnt hear me.” and then they’ll look at me, face to face, straight in my damn eyes and then turn away and i’m left there thinking: “well WTF was that?!”

I say this not to discount your own experiences. I mean i’ve definatly seen what you mention, in times were i’ve been in the masjid, although in my case it tends to be desis. But i find that its less of a problem with the sisters who were born and bred in the U.K (or the U.S where your at).

Its definatly frustrating though when it happens and its sometimes kind of embrassing when im in a public, busy place and you greet someone, twice, only for them to kinda snub you like that and when i’ve been with non muslims friends, they’re like: “what’s up with that?” cos they know that as muslim like we’ll greet other muslims, even if we’re strangers, with a salam and they kinda end up feeling pissed off for me (usually muttering “facety bitch” lol)

It used to irrate me before but now im just like whatever. But my mum, it infurates her. She’s like: “how dare they!”. My mum is the type of person who will go out of her way to give salams to another muslim, whoever they are, even if its the local drunk somali guy (whom we all know) who’s got a can of beer wrapped up in his brown paper bag. She’s like: “well even that drunk brother, he’s still a muslim and deserves our salam even if he’s not practising.” and thats a nice thing mashallah.

Its just a shame you know that sometimes that we treat one other like that. I mean i seen plently of times some people who’ve blanked me, who live in my community, and they’ll be nice to say the cashier at the grocery store- and theres nothing wrong with that, but yet that same person can’t even have the decency to return the greeting of salams to another fellow muslim who gave them a salam a few moments earlier. For every salam you give, you get ajar from allah, so if for anything thing, well why not do it for that?

anyway, just keep giving salams, cos even if they dont return it, you get twice the reward sis.

ma’salam